First Time

Its all in the first impression generally.We will be shaking and tensed and we want it to be perfect.Lucky. If it's a 'near-perfect.' It would be silly if I came up with lame 'hey am newbie here...take care of me.' I don't intend it to be a journal or diary or whatever you call it. Its like 'why do we have to care what you did today'...tick tick..time literally passing....what to write and how to write...wish I had a topic. 17 and half years to be precise....since I was born...had experiences..

Can i jolt down here but again wouldn't that be what i called before. If I talk about sex..my first impression is that am trying to 'act' bold who speaks absolute naive things about sex, in fact that would make me a bitch. Here goes..there needs at least introduction...Am 'aisu'..finished school(never a Disneyland)...going to college to study my madame 'English literature'

Why...because i want to be a writer..Its difficult to say these around...science group running frenzy here and there...to study engineering or medical...why? I didn't go?...because I don't see the creativity in the way its taken and given ...Ok I know million other who would disagree with me..but hey, I respect that...Its all exam oriented..and what by the end of the course, people will believe that FBI kinda dressed people(this is a vivid picture of watching too many Hollywood flicks and sitcoms) standing outside the door..to take you in...really?? What you need a job which you find so pale and cobwebbed...count me out..

I know so many who are being pushed by family..they want their kids to have a job...Excuse me,jobs are not pansies to grow in your garden, nowadays its quality that matters. Is that it? Somehow study and cram it in our little heads...and sit in a hotplate to get your ass burned. I see these people lack the passion. Passion...it means a lot...to human...its ecstasy and enstasy entwined that gives ultimate bliss and give a meaning to your life. Stuck up job never reach you anywhere...trapped in a circle...turning us into monstrous self...Is this what we are spending our childhood,teenage hood,adulthood to study? to get this?

Okay I guess this is getting too much in my head. Anyways...Hope you people support me so that I could write more. And I have something to say...